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5 Nov 2016

Man Writes Hilarious List Of Requests To Man ‘Doing’ His Wife & It’s Not A Joke

A man has written an open letter to the man his wife is cheating on him with. Entitled ‘To the man doing my wife’. the husband wanted to let the man know that he was not angry – but wanted to ask a few things of him after all he had been giving to his wife.

Instead of throwing around insults or threats, what he was asking of him was actually very light-hearted and admittedly hilarious.

Some of the requests including to stop leaving the toilet seat up as he keeps getting blamed for it, to stop drinking all of the beer in the fridge when he’s away on fishing trips (which he thoroughly enjoys and to at least buy some more or leave a bit of money if he does so).

The anonymous husband wrote: ‘Please replace the toilet paper when you use it all. For some reason my 5-year-old son believes if it’s not there he does not have to wipe. We keep it under the sink, unless you can recommend a better spot?
‘After doing my wife please use something disposable to wipe off with. The basket of clothes on the right is mine and the clothes are clean as my wife does not do my washing, I run out of time rushing to work. Last week my sweatshirt was crusty (thanks).’

He added: ‘Please do not tell my children that you are their uncle, they are young not mentally challenged.’

The man also asked that he stop turning the heating up, and to say no when his wife asks: ‘Do these pants make me look fat?’ – not to be nice but to prevent her buying more pants.

He also wrote: ‘Stop eating the baked goods. The brownies you ate were from my mom for my birthday. My wife has not cooked anything that good for years and if she does she will not share.’

He also added that if the man sleeping with his wife could take note of all of his requests, he would be rewarded with the details of when he would ‘next be gone and for how long so that he did not feel rushed next time he was in his house.

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