Narcissists always seem so nice to everyone but you. Have you ever wondered why this is so? To everyone else, they seem like such nice people, especially when you talk about them in public. In fact, other people may begin to see you as an ingrate when you talk about how horrible their treatment towards you is. However, no matter how charming, nice or hospitable people think they are, you and you alone know the kind of persons they are. This leaves us wondering, why do narcissists seem so nice to other people but cruel to us? Why do the narcissists you know treat you like nothing but treat others like pure gold? Why are narcissists willing to do anything for others but not for you? The answer lies below.
THEY REQUIRE CONSTANT NARCISSISTIC SUPPLY
You must understand that a narcissist only feels satisfied when they are in control or when they take away someone else’s happiness. If you can remember, when you first met them, they seemed very nice to you because you were a new and fresh target. At that point, they were still trying to get in your good graces, and the only way that could happen was by being nice to you so you would let your guard down. On that note, a narcissist in your life will be cruel to you because they are already where they want to be with you, hence you begin to see their true side. On the other hand, those who get to see their fake nice side are those who are still in the dark about their true nature.
THEY ARE PUNISHING YOU FOR SOMETHING
A narcissist can get very demanding, childish and outright dangerous when they don’t get what they want, especially from you. As you may already know, all a narcissist does is take, take and take from anyone including you. When they do not get what they want, or if you do not provide that opportunity for them to override you, they show you their cruel side. In the early of your relationship with them, they probably let things slide when it does not go their way, but now, they have become more familiar with you and do not feel the need to hide that ugly side of them. With a narcissist, you should be ready to provide all their needs and wants no matter how insignificant, otherwise, you run the risk of seeing a side of them that no one else will see.
YOU NO LONGER ALLOW MANIPULATION
Most, if not all narcissists show a side of them that makes it look like they care when the other person allows them to be in charge. For narcissists, being in charge means taking control of all situations, and that includes you. As long as they remain in charge, peace reigns. However, whe you begin to show signs of resistance or signs that you are standing up to their authority, they
begin to exhibit signs of cruelty to bend you to their will once more.
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The thing with narcissists is that they turn the whole situation in their favor. They make it look like you are at fault even when you are the victim. It is always about them and what they want, with no regards to what you want. The only way to deal with a narcissist is to take back the control and power from them. Until that happens, you will be stuck with an endless cycle of being manipulated and used.